


Five Convenient Lies About Dylan Merchant (And One Uncomfortable Truth)

by Merchant_3y3z



Category: Hypnospace Outlaw (Video Game)
Genre: 5 Things, 5+1 Things, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2020-02-10 12:13:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18660220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merchant_3y3z/pseuds/Merchant_3y3z
Summary: "Dylan rereads the About Me part of his Hypnospace page occasionally. It’s not because he’s self-obsessed or anything. It’s just good to refresh himself on the image he’s trying to present."aka, five lies on Dylan's Hypnospace page that he wants to believe about himself, and one truth that he doesn't.





	Five Convenient Lies About Dylan Merchant (And One Uncomfortable Truth)

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, all right, I did just write a 5 + 1 fic about Dylan being in denial about everything. Here's another. But it's different!
> 
> Also, everything in bold is a direct quote from Dylan's actual Hypnospace page.

Dylan rereads the About Me part of his Hypnospace page occasionally. It’s not because he’s self-obsessed or anything. It’s just good to refresh himself on the image he’s trying to present.

**1) LIKES: Listening to Legally Acquired Rock/Dirthaze/Cosmic Music**

Dylan would get his music straight from the artists if they didn’t charge so much for it! Sure, he’s got the money, but it’s the principle of the thing- he releases his music for free and they should too. Do they want an audience or not?

But people get so worked up about that kind of thing, so he’s got to play along. And again, he’d play nice with the artists if they’d play nice with him!

**2) LIKES: Chocolate Ice Cream (and only Chocolate)**

There are a couple other flavors he likes- occasionally- but this is such a funny little factoid about him that he keeps on using it. For a few years of his childhood, he really wouldn’t eat any other kind of ice cream. He grew out of that ages ago- he’s not a kid, after all. But it’s a funny story that humanizes him a little, and there’s really no harm in telling it like it’s still true.

Chocolate is still the best, so it’s not even that false. It’s just a little more than true.

**3) LIKES: Women**

He does like women, when they’re cool people. He’s just not attracted to them.

When he wrote this a year ago, he still actually believed it. He was stuck on the idea that someday he’d meet the right girl and things would click. But things have been stressful, and apparently sometimes he deals with stress by staring at handsome interns, and things had clicked in a way he hadn’t expected. Not that he’s going to date an intern, of course.

He’s pretty okay with having this on his page though, considering he’s still in the closet. Between that and making his hacker handle “80085,” he’s got an airtight cover story!

**4) I’m definitely the fun half of the equation. ;)**

He does have to be the practical one sometimes, whether that’s talking sense into Adrian or reining in M1NX, but he’s the fun one at heart. Someone’s got to keep things running, and sometimes that means laying down laws and being unpopular, but it’s only so the cool things can keep happening!

Anyway, he tries to be as cool about it as he can. It’s not his fault when other people don’t get the bigger picture- that makes them the uncool ones, anyway.

**5) A Cool Thing by Dylan + Business Stuff by Adrian = Tons of Cash**

Merchantsoft’s doing great, even if finances aren’t as great on the inside as they look from the outside. Tech startups always struggle a little, but Merchantsoft’s really starting to find its feet and it won’t be long until they’re reliably turning a profit.

Anyway, they barely pay their interns anyway so they can always afford to hire more.

  
  


Looking over the page one more time, Dylan feels good about how he’s following his vision for himself. Sure, everyone’s got to make a few compromises, but overall he’s putting his best foot forwards.

Then, before he closes the window, he looks back up at the message at the top. 

**+1) The stories are true: I’ve been tamed. Success will do that to a guy.**

Dylan knows he’s got his critics, so he put in a little self-deprecation- kind of a humble-brag, really, but he’s still acknowledging that he’s not who he was. He’s not a loose-cannon hacker anymore- he’s got the weight of a company on his shoulders.

But deep down, he doesn’t really think he’s been “tamed.” Whatever he does, wherever he goes, he’ll always be true to himself. Following his heart, speaking his mind, the whole deal.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
